The official student news site of Dougherty Valley High School.

The Wildcat Tribune

The official student news site of Dougherty Valley High School.

The Wildcat Tribune

The official student news site of Dougherty Valley High School.

The Wildcat Tribune

Pranav Patel-Singh with his app, SelfBetter. // OpenAI’s DALL-E.

Subject to Change: SelfBetter, the app that is now illegal

Srishreya (Shreya) Arunsaravanakumar, Opinions Editor March 26, 2024

In a world obsessed with constant improvement, where achieving your best self is a societal mandate, one app stands out from the plethora of self-help nonsense. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the age...

The International Space Station continues to fall. // Getty Images

Rescue efforts intensify as the International Space Station misses the Earth yet again

David Zhang, Staff Writer March 26, 2024

Disclaimer: This is a work of satire. An optimistic statement from NASA on Tuesday was the latest in a series of false announcements claiming that the space station was on an Earth-bound trajectory....

Clasp Variants

Clasp Variants

Nina Stadermann, Staff Writer March 26, 2024

Cops confused as to whether or not the Oompa Loompas’ orange faces are enough to classify them as suspicious persons of color.

Willy Wonka Under Fire for Toxic Work Environment

Kush Rajesh, Staff Writer March 26, 2024

January 4th, 2024 marks the fifth child to drown in the chocolate river within the walls of Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. Once considered to be a place of hope where whimsicality was fostered and...

The double-double doors at Dougherty don’t do a good job at letting people in-n-out.

Lock doors into the history books

William Zhao, Staff Writer January 22, 2024

Doors at Dougherty are a design disaster. They certainly are a staple of engineering, but in many cases, they should be scrapped entirely. The double doors that front the classroom buildings are so...

A student peers at her laptop in despair as Securely is cast.

Securely takes new steps to protect student innocence

Neetra Chakraborty, Art & Graphics Editor November 19, 2023

Disclaimer: This is a work of satire After an uptick in concerning student searches, the PR team of Securely has released a statement detailing new protective measures designed to maintain a healthy...

Vertebral Extension

Vertebral Extension

Nina Stadermann, Staff Writer November 2, 2023

In a world hurtling towards modernity at breakneck speed, who better to entrust with solving the complexities of our country than those born in the tranquil and timeless era of the 1940s?

Subject to Change: I swear I can run this country!

Srishreya (Shreya) Arunsaravanakumar, Opinions Editor October 4, 2023

Dear Reader,  Imagine being 80 years old, comfortably seated in a retirement home, engaged in a spirited game of Scrabble with your dear friends. Suddenly, a groundbreaking idea surges through your...

Indra Deshmukh healthily observing the effects of her crystals on her ex-boyfriend.

God forbid women do anything

Indra Deshmukh, Copy Editor May 25, 2023

Being a teenage girl is rough. When I meet someone new and tell them my favorite artist is Taylor Swift, I can see the spark in their eyes go out. It’s worse than mere disappointment – I can actively...

Protester at Dougherty Valley High School with the “A is for Apple not Android” organization.

Huge protests rock the west

Neetra Chakraborty, Art & Graphics Editor May 24, 2023

Fifteen years after its release, American citizens are finally breaking their silence and speaking out against the horrors of the Android phone.  Though the Android was tolerated in its early years,...

Here are the foods that I really enjoy during Ramadan.

My favorite foods to eat during Ramadan

Samuel (Sammy) Minioza May 15, 2023

As a practicing Muslim, Ramadan is one of my favorite (and least favorite) times of the year. Celebrating each night with family after a long  day and pursuing acts of service are some of the highlights...

This is the image of the milk menace of Dougherty.

It was me. I am responsible for everything wrong on campus

Samuel (Sammy) Minioza May 6, 2023

Yes, it was me. I cannot deny it any longer, all of the food related incidents were me. I take immense pleasure in saying that I alone am responsible for littering and throwing food around campus. It was...

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