Advice Column 18-19: Week 18

Hello DV students – thank you for submitting to the Wildcat Tribune’s advice column! We’ve tried our best to answer your questions for this week.

Disclaimer: The advice of the Wildcat Tribune Advice Column is provided by students, for students. While we have your best interests in mind, and we will try our best to help you, we are not expert sources for more serious topics. Our advice is intended to support you and help guide your decisions, but you are in no ways obligated to take it. Please email the Tribune if you feel the need to reach out for any kind of help or follow up for any inquiries.

The Tribune reserves the right to abstain from responding/publishing any submission. Please refrain from explicitly referencing other individuals in your submissions and/or using explicit language, as doing so may warrant the partial or total redaction of your question. We will not tolerate threats directed towards other students, and we will not respond to questions that we determine to be offensive or violent in nature.


Want to ask some anonymous questions and get advice? Our form opens every Monday and closes on Friday at 11:59 pm. Responses are always posted on Sundays on this website. Week 19’s responses will be available on Sunday, March 17.

Week 19 form: https://goo.gl/forms/EnDi165Yv1zYkpdV2


Q: (Going off of last week’s question) I think I like him more as a friend because he’s really nice, assiduous, funny, and kind, while I am a procrastinator and have anger management issues (don’t worry, I’ve worked on those issues enough to tone it down around friends or classmates), so I feel unworthy to be in a relationship that is more than a friendship. I don’t have the guts to ask him bc of that; what should I do?

– Sweet Sister 

A: Hey Sweet Sister,

Try slowly easing yourself into the idea of telling him, and become comfortable with yourself first. Being a procrastinator is definitely not something that should affect his opinion on you, considering that most of the students in this school probably are, too, so don’t worry too much about that. As for having anger issues, that doesn’t make you a lesser person — you’re clearly putting effort into toning them down, and having someone with you to support and care for you can help significantly. You are definitely not unworthy of a relationship, and to be honest, having anger issues just means you’re really passionate about some things. It could just be that when you aren’t treated with respect, it upsets you — standing up for yourself is important, and not everyone is brave enough to do that. Plus, from the way you’ve described him, it seems like he’d be understanding and that he’d care for and support you if you were to be in a relationship with him.

Good luck!!

Amrita 🙂

 

 

Q: hey im bored

– ayy lmao

A:

Hi Bored, I’m Hungry.

 

— Sarah “Hungry” Kim

 

 

Q: Hi Daniela!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

– It’sTheOrchestraRoomNotTheChoirRoom 

A: Hello It’sTheOrchestraRoomNotTheChoirRoom! I totally agree with you, it’s definitely the orchestra room and not the choir room (sorry choir people).

Have a great day!! 🙂

-Daniela

 

 

Q: How do you prove that you’re just a late-coming fan instead of a bandwagon when you start liking someone(people) well after they’ve become famous? also, hpc or normal precalc? 

– kittykat88

A: Hey kittykat88,

To combat the label of “bandwagon” can be tough. I suggest telling people you’re a late-coming fan because you only first heard of this artist/team/whatever after people started talking about them. All that talk made you curious so you checked them out and you realized that you’re totally into them. Just because you weren’t there from the very beginning doesn’t make you any less of a fan, it just means you stumbled upon them before they got big. If people hadn’t started talking about them, they would have remained unknown.

As someone currently taking HPC, I wish I had taken normal precalc. It honestly depends on the work ethic you have and what situation you’re in. Are you willing to do more review/practice problems than those assigned? What other classes are you taking next year? Are you okay with classes that are very fast-paced? Are you confident in your math skills? Do you enjoy math? HPC is definitely a lot of work. In fact, I should be studying for my math test tomorrow instead of responding to this question right now. HPC moves very fast. You have a quiz one week and a chapter test the next. Regular pre calc is definitely the easier route, but if you enjoy math (this is key) and want a bit of a challenge, then you should take HPC. The class is different for everyone but in my opinion, most people clutch a B. I myself got a B- last semester (hehe) after having a C up until the last month. Again, it ultimately depends on your comfort zone, what your interests are and your skills. Don’t take HPC just because it’s weighted. You and your unweighted GPA will thank you. (This will also allow you to spend more time on your other classes, especially the ones you’re interested in).

Hope this helps,

Caroline

 

 

Q: I give up on things really easily or I don’t try whether it’s in school or sports. I don’t know why I feel this way it started around winter break. When my homework is hard I just give up, I don’t try to do it. In the sport I play, when things don’t go the way I’d like I just feel sorry for myself and don’t do anything about it. How can I fix this feeling?

– scout 

A: Dear scout,

Don’t stress too much over this, as I’ve felt this way before. It’s the feeling of being “burnt-out.” You just need some motivation! I would say drink some coffee (as a coffee enthusiast myself), but that’s only kinda healthy in the morning and too much of it isn’t good for you. It’s all about finding what works for you.

For example, when it comes to homework/studying, use timers to budget your time. Study for tests several days in advance instead of the night before. Maybe you need to get a little more creative, so find a way to make homework a little more “fun.” I’ve felt this feeling with my schoolwork, and I recently created an Instagram study account where I post cool writing things and fancy notes (this account is very nerdy, but it works for me). Finally, please take breaks. I promise you, your mind will burn out and you won’t maintain the information as much as you should. This also leads into my point of sleep. As my close friend who takes AP Psych ranted to me the other day, you need sleep so your mind can compartmentalize and process all information. From here, your mind stores the info into mental “filing cabinets” and locks those cabinets to keep you from losing this information. With lack of sleep, comes lack of memory. I know it’s hard (and believe me, I struggle with this) but try to get at MINIMUM 6-7 hrs a night, 8 is ideal. If i get any less, I can’t focus nor am I a very nice person to be around that day.

Regarding extracurriculars/everything else in life, you find the drive for motivation through things you truly enjoy and are committed to. Are you playing a sport just because you can and/or your friends play, or are you doing it because YOU truly enjoy it? If you’re not playing for yourself, it’s not worth your time, as it’s just going to further de-motivate you. If you do enjoy the sport and you still feel this way, is there someone/thing that is making your sport-life toxic? Ex, a person who isn’t nice? If this is the case, block them out in any way you can and know your self-worth. Or maybe, you are board of the sport? Take a break and try something new?

When something is hard, try to step back and look at things in perspective; “is this going to affect who I will be when I graduate?” Usually, the answer is no. From here, take it one step at a time; one essay, one worksheet, one test, and so on. It’s easier said than done,  but I believe in you. My last tidbit I wanted to add is ALWAYS ask questions and annoy your teachers (in a good way). No great scientists, musicians, whatever, made it to where they are now without being intellectually curious. As a teenager, this is kinda hard to do with a short attention span, but this ties into the idea of looking at things in perspective. You gotta be a little curious to fuel your perspective, which empowers your motivation to do great things and to grow as a person.

Best of luck! 🙂

-Daniela

 

 

Q: Should i go to college where my crush and/lover is right now? I dont want to seem that I am going for them but i did get in and it’s a good school…

– Herkaderk 

A: Hey herkaderk

Is the school one of your first choices? No? If not, then don’t go.  Does this school have the major you want pursue? If not, THEN NO. Is this school one of your first choices? If not, then no.

It’s best not to make really important decisions such as college based off of your crush/lover. If the sole reason you’re even considering going to that school is because of that person, then don’t go. College is supposed to be for growth and meeting new people. If you’re in a relationship with this person, it doesn’t mean you have to break up with them to go to another college, you can always work long distance. If what you have is only a crush, then don’t go. The colleges you want to get into and have originally planned to go to, will have even more crush-worthy people and more exciting people. I mean do you really want to make your college decisions based on a high school crush?

Basing such type of decisions on a relationship/crush is just not worth it because feelings are unpredictable and can change at any given moment. What’s the guarantee that by the time you even get to the college, your feelings for them won’t change? Picking which college you’re going to go to is such an important decision and it wouldn’t be right to base it off of something so minuscule as a crush.

All in all, don’t go to the school just because the person you like/are dating is there. That would be a reckless and flight decision, and in the end is just not worth it.

Hope that helps!

Harshita

 

 

:Q: Where is my cocacola? The tribune still has not given me food despote the fact that i am outside your guys’ classroom like everyday. Give me food? Why are y’all so cruel with ur lack of generosity? Spare some of the food y’all get during ur meetings 

– The colacola

A: Dear The colacola,

I expected a more “spicy” question from you after you told me it would rank “around a 7” on a scale from 1-10. Regardless, I guess the best answer I can give to your series of questions is that the Tribune doesn’t drink Coca-Cola at pitch meetings – we eat bagels.

Much love,

Taylor

PS: Submit some of the satire you keep talking about – we want your submissions!