Hey Wildcats! This week, you asked, and we’re here to answer. Our Advice Column is all about making sure DV students always have someone to turn to for advice. We’re students too, just trying to help out, so while we hope our suggestions are useful, if you’re dealing with something serious, be sure to talk to a trusted adult who can connect you with the right support. Now, let’s dive into your questions!

Question One : I wanted to ask what to do if your friends repetitively did not invite you to birthdays or have been treating you differently. This hadn’t been a big problem, but during homecoming a girl had brought something for the whole group without me and I have never been in the group chats. How do I either move on or repair what is there? – ILOVEMEOWMEOWS

Dear ILOVEMEOWMEOWS, It seems like your friends didn’t truly value you from the start, judging by the behavior they’ve been displaying. You don’t owe them anything especially since this feels like an inexplicable shunning. I’ve been in my fair share of toxic friendships – sometimes it can feel like you’re nothing without your friend since they’re so much greater than you. Even though it may seem daunting to leave, you need to hold yourself to a high value. You deserve better than people who leave you out of everything. Try to also ask them if you did anything wrong in particular if you want clarity on your end, but if they don’t give you a valid reason, they aren’t worth your time. I hope you’re able to find new friends who treat you so much better. 

Best of luck, Shareen

—

Question Two : I keep getting rejected by guys; what can I do to finally get a yes or is it just impossible? –lonely lover

Dear Lonely Lover, I’m sorry to hear you’ve been struggling with this. Unfortunately, many of us go through a space of time where it feels like none of our endeavors, romantic or otherwise, are going right. It’s a special and fun part of high school that makes us all feel just overjoyed all the time (watch the sarcasm drip from my words). If I were a social media influencer, I’d just tell you to change your brand of shampoo or “rizz harder,” whatever that’s supposed to mean. There’s no magic key. If these people rejected you in a mean way, though, drop them from your life like hot potatoes. They’re under no obligation to be jerks. On your end, the right guy will turn up eventually, don’t fear. If those that you’ve crushed on already just aren’t ready for someone of your star power yet, that’s their problem. Focus on your friends for now – believe me, when it comes to love your good times are still coming. 

Best wishes,  Taylor

—

Question Three: Dear Wildcat Tribune, you asked “In a pickle? Need a second opinion? Fill out the form to be featured on the Wildcat Tribune’s Advice Column.” Well, I am literally in a pickle. How do I get out? –The Seed

Hello The Seed, You seem to be in quite the predicament. But don’t fret! I’m great at de-pickling debacles. First off, do you remember how you got in the pickle? Can you retrace your steps before you were sent to your vegetable demise? Or did you just come into existence with no recollection? Once you’ve identified the stem of the issue, I want you to remember who you are, or were, outside of your pickle-y shell. Are you really just a seed or are you something much more than that? Or maybe you resonate more with being a pickle. That’s perfectly okay. Now, to get you out of this pickle, I recommend you consult the actions of great pickles of the past: Pickle Rick, Pickle from “Pickle and Peanut” and whatever other pickle speaks to your heart. 

Best of luck, Shareen

—

Question Four : I’m a freshman and still can’t make any friends. What can I do next? – Friendless Person From Outer Space

Hello Friendless Person From Outer Space, I understand how you are feeling! In movies and TV shows, high school seems to be this big pool of everybody becoming best friends, having rivalries and just filled with so many social interactions, but that isn’t everyone’s experience. Freshman year is a time for people to get accustomed to this new educational environment, and that looks different for everyone. If you want to make more friends and get to know people, the best advice I can give you is to open up and talk. This feeling of loneliness is incredibly common, and just reaching out to people, complimenting them, and simply connecting with them is the best way genuine friendships can start. Personally, my closest friendships started off with random jokes and conversation; it might seem really scary to start the first conversation but after months of genuine conversations and memories, it all pays off. Moral of the story, just strike a conversation.

Best of luck to you, Anonymous.

—

Question Five : People are weird about my Instagram posts but I love dogs and that’s why that’s all I post online. What should I do? – Dog Lover

Hi Dog Lover, The pressure to fit in on social media is very real, especially when it seems like everyone is following the latest trends. It can be hard to remain true to yourself when you feel like you stick out like a sore thumb. In fact, I think you’d be surprised by how many people feel the exact same way that you do. Almost everyone I know has expressed that it’s not easy to maintain a perfect online profile that fits what’s considered “normal,” especially when that definition seems to be changing all the time. What’s in one minute is out the next, and it’s exhausting to keep up with. That’s why it’s even more important that you stay authentic and keep posting what makes you happy. Playing the never-ending social game of maintaining an impeccably curated digital presence is a trap, and at the end of the day, the only person your social media needs to make happy is you. I think it’s great that you’ve found a way to make Instagram into a positive experience for yourself, and you shouldn’t let anyone else’s opinions affect that. The people who are truly your friends won’t judge you for it!

Best of luck, Mahika